Rémoulade gets made first, ideally 1-2 days in advance. ONE TO TWO DAYS!!! This makes ALL the difference! Combine all ingredients, mix well, and let those flavors have an orgy in the fridge. Hashtag: literal food porno.
FOR THE FRIED SHRIMP!
Fill the bottom of a large pan with about an inch of oil. Place over medium-high heat and allow to warm up.
While waiting for oil to heat, pat-dry shrimp with a paper towel. Toss in the littlest bit of oil and season with salt and pepper.
In three separate, shallow bowls, fill one with flour, one with buttermilk, and one with panko. You may have to replenish throughout process.
Working in batches, coat shrimp completely in flour. Shake off excess flour before dipping in buttermilk. Let excess buttermilk drip off before dredging in panko. Really press the panko into those little shrimp dicks so the coating sticks. Set all breaded shrimp on a plate.
Oil should be heated by now. To check, dangle the tip of a shrimp into the oil. If it starts to bubble immediately, it's ready. If not, give it a few more minutes.
Place shrimp in oil, being careful not to over-crowd. You may have to work in batches. Fry until bottoms are a beautiful golden brown. Flip shrimp and repeat.
When shrimp are done being fried, place them on a paper towel-lined plate and immediately sprinkle with a little kosher salt. Do not stack your shrimpies.
FOR THE PO'BOY!
While the shrimp are cooling, butter the insides of your French rolls. Sprinkle lightly with garlic salt and broil until desired brown-ness.
Lather garlic bread all over with the insane rémoulade you made a few days ago.
On bottom half, add pickles, then shredded lettuce, then fried shrimp.
On top half, add tomato slices.
Smash top half onto everything so you can fit this chode in your mouth.
I am not above enjoying anything with some frozen fries, ok? Fresh or frozen, they're amazing dipped in any extra rémoulade or put on the sandwich itself.
HAPPY FUCKING MARDI GRAS!!!
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